"Single" Males

Single males are only permitted to obtain a L'Sota membership provided they are sponsored by a L'Sota member couple that is and has been a member couple of L'Sota for no less then 3 months AND that couple must be a L'Sota member couple in good standings.

A better and simpler way to be able to join and attend L'Sota? Attend the Single Male workshop! Click on the link within the menu links at the bottom of this page for information on the Single Male Workshop, you'll be glad that you did! Now, on with this page.

The first dance you attend as a sponsored single male member your sponsoring couple must be in attendence. After your first Dance Blast it is not a requirement that your sponsoring couple attend that Dance Blast.

Here are the steps necessary to become a sponsored single male member; 1) You must be 21 years of age or older. 2) You must obtain a sponsoring L'Sota member couple. 3) That couple must be a current member couple of L'Sota and the couple must have been a member couple of L'Sota for no less then 3 months prior AND that couple must have attended 2 (two) Dance Blast within that period of time before you're able to be sponsored by that couple. 4) Your sponsoring couple must be a member of L'Sota AND they must be in good standings with L'Sota. 5) You must request that your sponsoring couple call L'Sota to advise they are willing to sponsor you. 6) They (your sponsoring couple) must provide when calling L'Sota your full name, date of birth as well as the fact they desire to be your sponsoring couple. 7) After that YOU must e-mail L'Sota stating that you desire to become a sponsored single male member including the name of your sponsoring couple with your full name, date of birth as well as a phone number where we may contact you.

You shall then be contacted by L'Sota per instructions on the next step. In the event L'Sota has acquired, at that time to many requests to become a sponsored single male member you shall be advised of that fact. Your request for membership shall be placed upon a waiting list if you so desire.

What does a L'SOTA sponsored male membership consist of? A sponsored single male L'SOTA membership is only 49.95 and is good for 365 days from the date your membership is processed. Your sponsored single male L'SOTA membership provides to you the opportunity to register to attend L'Sota's Dance Blast Socials. Also, included as part of your sponsored single male membership shall be access to the "members only" area of this website which shall be completed in 2011. 

Registration to attend any L'Sota Dance Blast Social as a sponsored single male member is very limited and is not guaranteed once you become a sponsored single male member.  In other words, to attend a L'Sota Dance Blast you must be one of the first sponsored single male members to register.

The numbers of sponsored single male members permitted to attend any Dance Blast shall be restricted to a certain number of sponsored single males per the number of couples and single females that are registered per any Dance Blast.

L'Sota shall restrict the maximum number of sponsored single male member males at each L'Sota dance. This figure is adjustable based on couples as well as to the number of single females that have registered to attend a particular dance. In no event are you as a sponsored single male member guaranteed to be admitted UNLESS you are the first to register and pay for your dance package and of course, you're a L'Sota member in good standings.

A "single" male sponsored membership in L'SOTA as stated above is 49.95 per year. If the single sponsored male member acquires a female partner within the period of time that membership is enforce, no additional L'Sota membership costs are associated with bringing along a female partner. The single sponsored male membership will convert to a couples membership.

The single female will be required to complete a registration form, show two forms of ID as well as complete the pre dance orientation.

Once the membership is converted, the membership shall then be treated as a couples membership.

As a single male sponsored member you are permitted into the Hospitality Suite but are NOT permitted to go into the Group Suite without being invited by a couple OR a single female who is also going into the Group Suite.

Once that couple or single female that invited you into the Group Suite leaves the Group Suite, you must also leave with them or her. No exceptions! You must leave the GS with that couple or single female however once out of the GS that same couple or single female or another couple or single female may invite you to again enter the GS with them or her.

A word of caution.....In the event this rule is broken you will be asked to leave for the duration of the party and your single sponsored single male membership shall be immediately be revolked.

Sponsored single male member registrations are filled and confirmed on a first received basis. We suggest that you as a single male sponsored member make your reservations at least 20 days prior to any dance you wish to attend.

Please...... L’Sota is not the place to attend to cheat on your wife.

Once you become a single male sponsored L’Sota member you shall be required to attend a pre-dance orientation that is held at approximately 5:30 p.m. the afternoon of the dance.

If you as a sponsored single male member are paid and registered for a particular dance and fail to make the orientation, you shall not be admitted to the dance or enter the Hospitality Suite. No refunds or credits shall be issued; therefore, it is imperative that if you are a new sponsored single male member that is registered and that has paid to attend your first dance, that you make the orientation.

Make no mistake, as a single sponsored male member, just as it is for all others that attend a L’Sota dance, if a single sponsored male member is found bothering as in not accepting "No Thanks" or being rude or crude in any way with any couple or single female they are OUT! Out of the dance and off of the property! One founded complaint, that is all that it takes. This is true for couples, males of a couple, females of a couple and single females....anyone!

L’Sota is a no tolerance of pressure club! If any club member, single or a couple, is asked to leave, no refunds or credits shall be issued.


Q: Can I find a single female partner at L’Sota?

A: In all honesty, it's extremely doubtful. Most of the single females that attend L'Sota are not seeking a relationship, many if not most all are bi-sexual, meaning they are seeking other females and maybe couples. Of course for them to dance with you is a very good possibility.

Q: I’m a married male but my wife won’t swing. Am I able to join L’Sota?

A: Sure, once you have brought your wife to orientation and she indicates to us that she has no problem with you attending the dances without her.

See, what so oftentimes occurs is that many married males or those with a partner desire to party with other males’ female partner(s), but they don’t desire other males to party and indulge with their wife or female partner.

It most certainly can be a jealousy thing on the males part. Many will say "she won't attend a function" or "she is not into swinging" etc. Come on, in all honesty what she is going to do is attend a dance, meet some great people, socialize and dance. What woman wouldn't enjoy doing that? If a male approaches his wife of partner correctly as well as respectfully there is a 90% or better chance she will attend to at the least see what it's all about.

Q: I’m married (or a male involved with a female). We as a couple want to find a single female to join us. My wife/partner has no desire to be with another male. We only want another female so she can try a bi-sexual experience. Can we find an extra female?

A: Have you ever tried fishing in the middle of the Interstate? Anything is possible however it would not be likely, but who knows? To be totally honest, if you truly desire to make points with your female partner, discover if she would like to try you and another male! Now, that's one for you to think about.

We’re not talking a bi-sexual male thing but a male that can help you bring her to heights of new hedonistic pleasures. Think of it this way, as much as you desire two women, most women, whether or not they openly and or verbally admit it, would at least once enjoy two men.

Q: I am a bi sexual single male, would I be welcome at L'Sota?

A: Certainly. The only issue would in all due respect for couples as well as single females is that you indicate to them if and before you actually "hook up" that you're in fact a bi sexual male.

This provides them the opportunity to say "yes" or "no". There are couples as well as single females that have no desire to swing with a bi male or a bi male of a couple. On the other hand there are those that it makes no difference and then those that desire it that way. There are many reasons for their reasoning, we won't go into that here.

Q: I am a single male. I can’t find a female partner to attend, what can I do?

A: Trust me, there are many, many women that would love to attend that are single but they don’t want to attend by themselves. First, you must know what you’re talking about when you speak to a prospective female partner about the Alternative Adult Lifestyle.

How are you able to speak intellectually about a topic you yourself are unfamiliar with? Read the entire L’Sota web site, read other web sites, go to the L’Sota "link" page and check out Patti Thomas’ book Patti Thomas's "Recreational Sex", www.pattithomas.com as it provides great information over the Alternative Adult Lifestyle.

If you can’t find a single female to attend, then obviously you are not trying to find a female partner or maybe you simply do not desire to share your partner? All of us that attend as couples obviously have a partner or partners, so why can’t you?

Try personal ads, ask those that you know or date. It’s much easier than you think. You must know whom to ask, when to ask and how to approach the subject. All you and she are actually doing is attending a dance. You may be surprised, she may actually enjoy it as much or maybe more then what you will.

Q: Why are single males most often not allowed at other clubs?

A: Some clubs allow single males other clubs don't. Each club has it's own policy. There are males of couples within the Lifestyle that feel the "competition" presented by single males is too much to handle for them. So why do couples care if a club allows single males or not? Other males of couples think and worry that the single male will tell and brag about attending. How do you know a male or for that matter a female of a couple won't do the same thing? Still another male of a couple stated that "swinging and the Alternative Adult Lifestyle is a couple’s only thing." Everyone is of course entitled to their own opinion, and opinions are just that.

Q: So what you’re saying is that at L' Sota as a single male I shouldn’t approach a couple or the female of a couple to play?

A: That is correct. If they are interested in you then they (or she) will approach you. When you attend a L'Sota dance, you would be seated at a table at the dance with couples. You would socialize just like you would at your company party, or a block party. If you’re truly a genuinely nice and respectful male you’ll get along just fine. You’ll meet many great couples as well as possibly a few single females. What adult couples and adult singles do is of course their business. Some couples truly enjoy a single male joining them, others have no desire in single males. The best approach for an example; to dancing with a female of a couple would be to ask the male of the couple if you may dance with his female partner. He may say,"Sure, it’s up to her." This is most often what occurs. He/she may also tell you "no thanks".  In all honestly, it's all about respect. Treat others as you desire to be treated that always being with respect.

Q: So as I dance with this female, I can then feel her ass and her body?

A: That is a great way to be shown the door! No you can’t! Would you want your mother to be treated like that? Proper etiquette would always be to ask, "May I place my hand on your butt?" Something like that. Just because a female would dance with you DOES NOT MEAN YOU CAN FEEL HER UP! This not only applies to single males but all males, and the same is true for a female that would desire to feel up a male. It’s all about total and unconditional R E S P E C T ! Respect for yourself, as well as respect for all those in attendance, that is part of L'Sota and the Alternative Adult Lifestyle.

Q: I am a divorced male, clean, respectful, nice looking guy, truly a nice guy. I would like to attend to meet others that are also clean and respectful. I know that it’s not a "meat market." Would I be welcomed?

A: Yes! If more males were like you the "stigma" of single males wouldn’t be what it is today with our Lifestyle. No matter what, there shall always be a few males of couples that for what ever the reason don't want single males to attend any swinging function any where. There is not much that anyone can do for those few. That is just the way it is.

The above are just a few of the many questions that L’Sota has addressed over the past twenty years. If you have questions, feel free to contact L’Sota at 319-329-3306. Feel free to leave a message if we are unavailable answer your call, we shall get back with you. You may of course also e-mail us.


of Events

Camping What is L'Sota Join Now
The L'Sota Advantage Dance Blast Next Event Beginning FAQ's
Orientation & Overview Play Nights Location Advantages of Membership Ettiquette
Meet the Hosts Thoughts and Observations Bi Females Single Females Single Males
Myths Couples Workshop Single Male Workshop Seminars Club Links
Health & STD Links Organization Links Fantasy Terms Privacy Policy

Questions? Simply call or e-mail us direct at

(319) 329-3306

Email: lsota@aol.com